Doubt Spiral

I can't be here,
alone with my thoughts.

I thought I was fine until I wasn't,
and I don't know when it started.

Maybe it was that look
or the silence
or maybe nothing at all
just a flicker in my brain
like a switch i didn't touch
and now it's all unraveling

what if i'm wrong what
if i've always been wrong what if
everyone knows i'm wrong and they're
just too kind to say it or too tired
of me falling apart or too far
away or too gone and i
shouldn't be here and i shouldn't
have said that and i shouldn't
have done that and my
chest is full of bees just making
noise too much noise in
my head all the voices are
shouting at all the other voices and
i can't make them stop
and if i'm so fucking smart why
can't i figure out how to control
my own brain

i'm unraveling
and i'm trying to breathe but i can't
the air slips away like everything else
i'm so sorry i'm so scared i'm so scared of everything

and i don’t know how
to stop
falling